Practitioner Diploma / “Helping people is addictive”

Becky McKinlay, managing director of Oystercatchers, is a strategic and creative business leader with extensive experience across advertising, communications and media. She has held senior management roles at brands including the Financial Times Group, The Economist Group, and also led her own communications agency, Ambition London. Here, Becky reflects on her journey through coach training and the AoEC’s Practitioner Diploma in Executive Coaching.

What or who introduced you to coaching and led to you signing up with AoEC?

I have been fortunate enough to work with organisations who see the benefit of executive coaching. On two occasions, once following a promotion and once as I took on a new role, I’ve been able to receive executive coaching. The second time was a revelation – it allowed me to reframe my perspective, develop my leadership skills and ultimately enabled me to truly love my work again.

That, coupled with the number of requests I regularly received to either coach or mentor individuals in the workplace, encouraged me to look at how I could qualify as a coach myself. Happy to informally mentor and coach, I was keen to ensure I had the foundations in place to do it properly, and also to adopt a coaching style within my leadership approach.

I researched a few organisations, but ultimately AoEC was recommended to me by a couple of respected colleagues who had completed, and enjoyed, their courses.

What were some of the positives and challenges?

I found the course a real stretch. Not in terms of time, but in terms of unlearning to relearn. I’ve been an MD in fast moving environments for a number of years. My default is to help, direct, suggest and at times, instruct. Coaching made me pause, to listen much much better than I typically did, and to get used to supporting in that way.

At times the course was draining – and that was because of the positive vulnerability my training cohort all brought to it – we made friends, we laughed, we cried, we learned. And then we were back into our day jobs, catching up on everything we’d missed during our classroom days. I didn’t consider how much of a stretch and how exhausting the mental investment to training would be.

What is your advice to others considering coach training?

Know why you’re doing it. Lots of people see coaching as a ‘way out’ of day job. I’m not sure that’s the reason to do it. Being a coach, to my mind, makes you a better leader, colleague and human. Being a coach full time is harder than people expect. So go into with an open mind – whatever the outcome you’ll learn and benefit from it, but don’t assume it’s your parachute to an entirely new career.

Looking back at your diploma, what has been its lasting impact on you as a person and as a coach?

That having the coaching foundations, tools and frameworks are useful to navigate all sorts of situations and relationships. That not all coaching engagements need you to use particular methods, knowing them gives you confidence that you are having more than a helpful chat. Enabling colleagues to solve their own problems and unlock their own potential is a superpower that traditional leadership doesn’t address.

Can you tell us more about your personal coaching model and how has this evolved since the diploma?

I was clear at the outset that I wanted to coach in the area of confident communications, connection & collaboration, and creativity & adaptability. Because I’ve always worked in creative and communication industries, this seemed my natural habitat and I could match what I’d learned in the day job, with my coaching style. That has remained the same. I am sought out by those people who need to develop in those areas.

What has changed has been my own confidence – I often step out of coaching and into mentoring or combine the two. In the early days, I didn’t feel that was appropriate, now I can see the signs for when that approach is needed, and know how to signal to my coachees that, with their permission, that is the best approach to take.

You recently became MD at Oystercatchers – what difference has coach training had for you in your style of leadership

I have always been a collaborative leader or thought I have been. Coaching has probably improved this style – no longer do I ask for inputs and then quickly move on when they don’t come or suit my perceptions of how it should be done. I embrace silences and reflection more than I have previously. My pace has slowed slightly – and my inputs and outputs are better for it.

Tell us about your work at Oystercatchers. How are you building coaching into your people management strategies and who is receiving coaching within the organisation?

I don’t formally coach internally. That is a boundary I have set myself to avoid conflict and overload. I do coach informally and my team may not be aware that I am. I also coach externally and have joined an informal network of coaches to enable that. I recommend coaching to a number of my colleagues – at all levels of seniority. I also talk about it a lot.

My first experience of coaching wasn’t as beneficial as my second one, as I didn’t really understand what coaching was and expected a different outcome. I think it’s really important that people are ready and equipped to embark on coaching to benefit properly from it. It’s a significant investment and can be a waste if that preparation isn’t done.

What are some of the issues and opportunities you coach people around?

Reframing impostor syndrome to the inner voice of internal coach – complacency is dangerous, nerves are good. Being nervous or concerned shows you care but can also be stifling. Using external voice and chair exercise really help with this – stepping outside the issues and allowing coachees to see the issues from someone else’s perspective.

Finding their comfortable and confident voice. So much of how we communicate informs how we perform. Embracing and holding silence is so powerful – it puts you in control, allows you to pause, and helps you to think about what is better left unsaid.

Adaptability – every leader needs to navigate change. Adapting to different environments and challenging behaviours comes up in nearly every coachee engagement. Reframing impostor syndrome work helps with this, as does being centred on your values and style.

Can you share a success story or testimonial from one of your coachees that highlights the impact of your coaching?

One of the most rewarding engagements I have had, is working with someone who had just been made redundant and had a few job knock backs, to her securing a new role, at a more senior title than she had before. It was quite the journey – and the coachee worked incredibly hard between sessions to put into practice all we worked on. This was her testimonial post our work:

‘I had the good fortune to be coached by Becky, over a series of sessions, during a period of transition this year, her own career experience and expertise came through in her natural and warm coaching style. She challenges you to think deeply in order to reach simple, actionable solutions and carefully combines elements of coaching and mentoring, as needed. I thoroughly enjoyed every session with Becky and came out of each one feeling more confident and clearer in my direction.’

What do you find most rewarding about your work as a coach?

Seeing the lights come on! From a puzzled, nervous or overwrought demeanour at the beginning of one session to a smiling, proactive or re-energised one at the end. Helping people is addictive. I feel fulfilled, energised and really positive after nearly every coaching session.

Our deepest thanks to Becky for sharing her personal journey and experience of coach training at the AoEC.